I’m a huge paradox of stuff that probably won’t make sense. I’m an indecisive person that can never decide. I’ll think of my choice, but I don’t want to say it out loud, in case people don’t agree with me. I’ll usually agree with whomever I’m with and let that person decide. I’m the less picky one, I usually find something on a menu if we go out to eat. I hate staying up late sometimes because of where my mind trails off to, but then again, I absolutely love it because that’s when some of my best and truthful stuff is written. Sometimes, it’s my favorite piece I’ve written.
I don’t like making choices, but I like having the option of making a choice. Funny how that seems to be the case. I’d like to believe humans make all the right choices, but we do not. In my skewed mind, I think not having the choice, is worse than making the wrong choice.
Agreed? If not, that’s okay too. This ranges from social to political situations that are fairly relevant, but I won’t delve into politics on my blog, that just gets way too messy for my liking.
Looking back, I do wonder what other opportunities would have led me to some victorious and brilliant things if I would have picked this decision, or that one. Then again, life is pretty satisfying right now. I just like to daydream. I can’t help but speculate sometimes if I did “lose” or “miss” something else that would’ve been great. I guess that the poet in me to romanticize a bunch of stuff, haha.
Every other choice though that I have made, I’m living it. It is fun to imagine my parallel life of the opposite decision, sometimes I write about that as my muse and it’s fun for a while.
I get how overwhelming it is to have so many choices in life. I know that a new calendar year enacts as this suddenly shift to change our lives after 365 days.
My question was, why wait until a new year to switch up our regular lifestyle?
It’s not as if there’s a sudden shift in the world and everything feels completely different; but, maybe that’s just me since I’m getting older and all the days and years seem to bleed in together?
It somewhat feels satisfying to have a new planner, I will admit, but it’s not like I’m trying to completely change up a lifestyle. Power to you all that are wanting to improve your lives if you are setting goals! I’m not shaming that, I just wonder why for a new calendar year!?
It’s as if some people I know just give up in September and they’ll “try again next year.” That mentality confuses me. There’s still a hundred and some days of this year; you’re going to let the last 2/3 of the year’s effort go to waste? Inconceivable!
*I’m not completely sure how I derailed the content of my own blog subject, but I kind of like it and I shall stick with it; it reflects my own conversations with people sometime, but I always find my way back – eventually!
Personally, I do think with my age and experience as the time is passing, I have noticed the amount of times I have been decisive. There’s a new type of assertiveness that I’m starting to get the hang of. I also contribute this to watching tv shows because I’ll pretend to be in a character’s position.
I am restarting One Tree Hill so I’m sure I’ll have some more blog worthy posts since I relate so much to a few characters. The series left me in so many tears! It’s funny to think sometimes.
For this year, it’s not a resolution, but a continuation of making choices, to not let life make the choices for me because I lacked the assertiveness to do so.
This is all I have for now; I’m holding back on some posts I’ve written because they just don’t seem like the most appropriate time to post them. Their time shall come in the future!
Anyways, I hope everyone has had a great day so far! Hopefully I’ll get out of this blogging funk and write more meaningful posts.