I don’t believe I had a “teenage rebellion.” Well, I probably did but it’s not the shade of rebellion that most are familiar with. Instead of going out with friends and going on adventures that are borderline illegal, or absolutely illegal in some cases, I became more closed off to the world.
My mother and I had a rough relationship at this point; we didn’t agree on much about my future. I wasn’t happy during my senior year, I wrongly took it out on her.
I didn’t want to go to the university that was 30 minutes away from home – also her alma mater. There was nothing against it, I just felt as if I were stuck in life, not growing within my city. I didn’t even want to go to college, but I know my future self would thank me. I definitely am glad to have gone!
I mainly holed myself up in my room, does that count as some type of rebellion? Probably not, but I am fine with that!
I don’t consider this an act of rebellion, but about a year and a half ago, I decided to get my septum pierced. I’m never one to take drastic measures and get something without thinking of different angles prior before taking action.
In my family’s perspective, this is an absolute no to get any piercings — other than ears — or tattoos. When my cousin got a tattoo about 3 years ago, my family flipped. They weren’t as surprised since she has more of a rebellious attitude.
That wasn’t the same reaction when I got my nose pierced; my family was in greater shock. In the parental aspect, it doesn’t seem like something I would have done, so it was a huge deal when I had mine pierced during my Spring semester of college, away from my hometown.
There were many responses from my parents.
“Why would you want to do that?”
“You’ll regret it when you’re older.”
“What will you do when you work and can’t have it visible?”
Just to list a few.
I had been wanting to have mine pierced for years, but I never gained the courage to actually do it because I was too concerned with pleasing everyone else.
Adults do have the better guidance, but sometimes I feel as if they try to conform our generation with theirs. Some are still stuck in the mindset of decades ago with how the millennials of today should act. I admit, some may seem pretty extreme and reckless, but that’s their stories to retell to generations later.
Sometimes there are times to remain within the boundaries; other times, it’s okay to press beyond them. Depending on what the context is, though.
We cannot control others, just love them and give them gentle opinions to weigh in their minds.
On the other hand, why shouldn’t I get my nose pierced because of that? I was 21 at the time of this decision. My mom wouldn’t let lie dye my hair until I turned 18, then I could make my decisions on my own. Whenever I turned 18, I had the underneath of my hair dyed red, then blue once I got tired of the red.
I knew she wouldn’t like the piercing idea, but I did it anyway with my gentle approach.
It wasn’t a “me wanting to go out and get something permanently on me forever that I just thought about an hour ago” decision. No, the piercing’s hole is invisible, I could simply flip it up when needed for work. I even looked in my area for a place that was reputable and incredibly sanitary with their clients.
I found videos of people getting theirs pierced so I knew what to expect. [Some have said to not do this prior to getting anything done, but I’m the type of person that wants to know what to expect in case it happens to me!] This was me planning. I just had to act on it.
The most scary part was to tell my parents.
I called my mom to talk to her first and I was afraid. She is more openly opinionated with what her children have to do; I wasn’t afraid of her response though. The parent I was terrified to tell was my dad. My dad talked on the phone in this low, quiet voice — the one where you know when a dad is mad but trying to keep his voice level!
I knew my voice was quivering, but I did explain to them why I wanted to get mine pierced.
For me, it was the overall initiative to getting it pierced. I weighed in the amount of concern and questions I’d get from them. I had to keep in mind what my family would say, how the world would perceive this new image, and how to overcome my fear of speaking up for something outside my comfort zone.
It is the backbone and voice I now developed for myself. I figured out how to use my voice. It was because the experience of having it done and then the post events to deal with.
It’s a difficult decision to go against my parents on something, since they are usually right. Yet, sometimes we do because we are finding our own identities, not because we want to rebel. [Well, in my case when I do something, I cannot vouch for everyone else.]
It is important to have others weigh in their opinions, but ultimately, I like to think critically about a decision prior to making it by scoping out the different angles.
My parents still don’t like it to this day, but I don’t regret having it done.
Have a happy Friday!